Loneliness - A song of silence

Behind the veil of this shared emotion, can there be an invitation toward deeper truth?

Loneliness, a universal shadow emotion, often occurs from a perceived lack of social connection, resulting in intense feelings of isolation. This disconnect arises from a belief in the mind that there is a large disparity between our desired and current levels of social intimacy.

Our bonds with others represent a beautiful dimension of existence, adding warmth and richness to our lives. Naturally, we crave this experience in all its vibrancy.

Yet, upon introspection during moments of solitude, we uncover a profound insight: a sense of seclusion in the mind reveals its deeper disconnection with our true selves. It reflects a fear of inner silence and a resistance toward acknowledgment of our own presence within.

This fear often misleads us into seeking external connections to fill an internal void. The missing puzzle piece is the mind's ignorance of our true essence, leading to acute yearning and suffering.

This distress is triggered by misconceptions rooted in the ego—a false self, created by the mind, that is designed to incorrectly promise fulfillment from external sources.

As a result, loneliness can be a powerful opportunity to shine the light of awareness on this misalignment within and has the potential to transform our mental landscape.

“Do not feel lonely, the entire Universe is inside you.”

- Rumi

Throughout our lives, we find ourselves trying to seek refuge from silence by packing our days with activities, sounds from entertainment devices, or engaging in constant social interactions. In conversations, we see ourselves dreading the natural energizing pauses that follow the end of a thought stream. We label it as awkward and rush to fill the space with ineffective words.

We fear being alone with ourselves because we identify with that part of the mind that wants to evade complete stillness.

In these moments we fail to see that every cell inside of us is conscious. There is a whole world inside of us not just biologically, but mentally and spiritually. The world outside is interconnected to the world inside in ways our minds cannot comprehend.

When we are pushed by circumstances to feel the silence inside, perhaps when alone or even amidst a crowd, we experience a state of loneliness, seeking solace in deep connections that come with validation or understanding from others. But if we become fully aware of this feeling at the moment it arises, we recognize that it is a distraction from the true need to connect with ourselves.

We don’t realize that it is this very silence that is our true nature.

To understand further, consider an incident involving the great enlightened master, Sri Ramana Maharshi, and a devotee. Quoting this excerpt shared by Arunachala Ashrama from Shrimati T. R. Kanakammal's talks below :

Once a devotee wished to record the voice of the great Master. Eager to record the master's voice, the devotee timidly sought permission, finding encouragement when the master showed interest in the tape recorder's technicalities. Post the conversation, feeling emboldened, the devotee instructed everyone in the hall to remain quiet so he could initiate the recording. The next moment as he started the recording, silence fell. The Master remained still, keenly observing all that was transpiring. The recording could only capture the natural sounds in the room like the whizzing sound of the reel of the recorder and this went on for as long as 15 min. The perplexed devotee stopped recording and then, asked the Master why he had stopped speaking as soon as the recording device was switched on.

The Master replied: "Why do you think so? My voice, indeed, has been recorded. My language is that of silence, and that has been recorded. Is it not so?" On hearing this the devotee stood baffled.

Silence is inherent to our being. It is the fragrance of our true self. It is the voice through which the universe communicates. It is the thread that seems to bind everything in our perception.

And still, our mind feels desperate from moment to moment to escape this very silence that lies at the core of existence.

From this desperation arises loneliness. A paradoxical emotion that gives rise to a deep yearning to be with others whether we are alone or surrounded by our loved ones, signaling a desire to be understood.

The thoughts that label this sensation of sorrow as loneliness create an illusion that separates our presence from the ocean of universal presence. Ancient Indian scriptures such as the Vedas called this illusion as “Maya” in Sanskrit, referring to the seed of delusion or ignorance in the mind that gives rise to this feeling of separateness.

While it may seem like the blame lies in the mind, the attempt here is to not condemn but recognize that these are opportunities or signals for greater self-awareness. It's a chance to hone in on our capacity to be fully present so we can become aware of the latent tendencies that lie in the human mind by design. To rise above our programmed responses so we can drop all false identifications with the ego and develop a mindful connection with the silence within.

* We'll be using this symbol to suggest areas where you can choose to pause and actively practice the following steps

In times when feelings of isolation seem imminent, we must use this reminder, saying it aloud to ourselves if need be, as we feel our presence inside the body, focusing on the breath -

"Don’t give up. You are the world. You can be alone yet feel a powerful presence, a sense of aliveness within you."

When we notice that presence, our true being, we discover our completeness, our fullness, and the aroma of peace, joy, bliss, and love, that arises out of it naturally. all of it contained within our real self.

With continued practice, we find ourselves more accepting of everything that is coming up within us, no matter how distasteful it seems. When we are at ease with the most difficult parts of what we identify ourselves to be, we release ourselves from this self-made cage.

Then, we are free to embrace silence, the melody of our true self. A silence that permeates every particle of sound present within and without.

We are able to let ourselves immerse fully into this natural, whole, serene stillness, and rejoice in being engulfed by it.

From there emanates a pure joy and celebration of existing. No mental labels can survive through this unless we again get lost in the murmurs of Maya.

Let's aspire to stand resilient against the waves of illusion (Maya) so we can fully open the door to our inner Universe, which has been patiently awaiting a long while for us to return home.

In conclusion, understanding the greater truths behind our feelings of loneliness enables us to rise above them and appreciate the benefits of authentic solitude. When effectively utilized as a practice, it not only enhances our self-awareness to break free from limitations but also enriches our relationships with others around us.