Identity-Less

Drop all ideas about yourself and start from scratch

Forget all you know about yourself; forget all you have ever thought about yourself; start as if you know nothing.

- Jiddu Krishnamurti

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where the very idea of who you are, your preferences, and your guiding values seemed to stand in the way rather than pave the path forward?

Often, suffering emerges from our relentless attachment to certain identities, bringing about unnecessary pain. This attachment can confine us to narrow perspectives & beliefs and keep us from experiencing all that life has to offer.

In this article, we will explore the essence of identity, the pitfalls of clinging to it, and the profound freedom that awaits those who transcend this tendency.

What is an identity?

As detailed in our previous post on Shadow Work, our minds tend to form an ego identity by labeling, forming beliefs, and attaching preferences to everything we experience in our world.

For instance, imagine an individual who perceives himself as a twenty-year-old male, passionate about hockey, a loving son, a software developer, enjoys lasagna, dislikes chocolate ice cream, and believes he excels at coding but not art. These elements collectively constitute the labels, beliefs, and preferences that compose this person's current identity, shaped by their mind based on specific past experiences.

Drawbacks of Identity Attachment

Every experience in life either strengthens existing aspects of our current identity or introduces a new one.

While some of these preferences seem harmless, the problem arises when we refuse to let them go even when the situation demands it.

A blind spot we most often encounter on the path of transformation is being attached to an identity that no longer rewards us. Instead, it continues to shackle us in its limitations as is the nature of anything with a defined form.

When the cracks of expansion or growth do start to appear, we refuse to realize and let go of this assumed form that was never us.

We don't recognize that we have already outgrown this identity, and dismiss the need to adopt a new one. We find comfort in letting destructive patterns repeat. Despite the grief it causes, we continue to hold onto an obsolete identity and an incorrect sense of self.

This attachment stems from our minds' tendency to perpetuate a false, limited self-image.

This results in mental suffering.

Consequently, an identity crisis occurs when life situations arise where we lose the very thing around which our assumed sense of self might be centered such as a prized job, relationships, material possessions, physical appearance, etc.

To elaborate, consider someone who has always identified themselves strongly with their career and believes that their job title defines their worth. Tomorrow, a job loss or career setback may lead to acute suffering as they feel a loss of identity and self-worth. Similarly, individuals who tie their identity closely to their physical appearance may experience suffering when they don't meet their own or societal beauty standards. Social media platforms can also amplify identity-related suffering. We often compare our real lives to the curated, idealized identities we see online, which can lead to feelings of inadequacy.

Yet, even when we attempt to let go of an identity, the mind can produce all sorts of fears in resistance such as a fear of discomfort, uncertainty, or failure.

Some of these feelings are commonly experienced before life-changing circumstances such as a move to a new country, or a new job, etc. which actually reflect a shift in identity.

This resistance can lead to more distressing situations. We might argue with loved ones, fail to stand up for ourselves when treated unfairly, or keep saying yes to joyless situations just to seek validation.

As long as we resist examining the constraints of our assumed identity, these patterns of suffering can continue to persist in our lives.

Path of Transcendence

"Transcending mind-made limitations doesn't mean you stop being yourself. On the contrary, you become more yourself than ever before."

- Steven Ross

If we carefully inspect our experiences, we notice that there is freedom in letting go. This process requires us to remain aware of the resistance our minds generate as life unfolds.

Some of the subtle traits and long-held beliefs within our ego identity though no longer beneficial, might feel challenging to pinpoint. Nevertheless, in any situation, we have the capacity to remain as detached observers of our thoughts.

When we calm our minds, we can observe these beliefs evolving into thoughts that appear on our screen of consciousness. This awareness helps us clearly see that we are not the thoughts, and these beliefs about ourselves are not grounded in reality rather they are constraining us.

"To live and operate in the world, you may have to identify with something. Play with your identifications - don’t let them rule you."

- Sadhguru

To clarify further, we don't actively attempt to reject a specific identity. Instead, we acknowledge that this identity is not all-encompassing and does not define our true selves. Over time, we come to witness that nearly every identity has inherent limitations, and we grasp the importance of being open in our preferences.

The journey to discovering our true self entails realizing that we are not defined by any identity our minds attach to and embracing an identity-less state.

What does identity-less living look like?

Living from an identity-less state involves freeing oneself from the constraints of preconceived notions, beliefs, and labels, and instead, adopting a more fluid and open approach to life.

It implies releasing rigid self-definitions and understanding that you are not confined to a single identity. Instead, you remain open to a range of possibilities and roles.

It emphasizes living fully in the present moment without being burdened by past identities or future expectations.

Identity-less action doesn't mean inaction.

It allows you to respond to situations and make choices based on what feels right at the moment, rather than what your identity dictates. Playing whatever role that might be necessary at present.

"Every human being unconsciously is longing to expand in a limitless way. So every human being unconsciously is looking for a boundless nature or a limitless possibility"

- Sadhguru

Some benefits that we experience by adopting an identity-less mindset:

1. Freedom from attachments: Identity-less living involves reducing the ego's influence by not clinging to identities for self-worth or approval from others. We become free from ego attachments.

2. Adaptability: We become more open to change and find it easy to pivot as needed. We are willing to embrace new perspectives, beliefs, and roles as circumstances evolve.

3. Non-Judgment: Without fixed identities to uphold, there's less inclination to judge yourself and others based on specific beliefs, fostering a more accepting and compassionate attitude.

4. Authenticity: Paradoxically, identity-less living can lead to greater authenticity. When we are not confined by societal expectations or self-imposed identities, we are more likely to express our true selves without filters.

5. An Expansive Sense of Self: We realize that we are capable of much more than we let our minds assume and what we believe. We are beyond the obstacles life presents us with. As long as we allow ourselves to transform, focusing on the current step, we can adapt, shift identities, and mold into whatever the present moment needs. Being identityless, allows us to transcend our strengths and weaknesses, and explore endless possibilities.

By freeing oneself from limiting beliefs and self-imposed boundaries associated with identity, one can explore their full potential and capabilities. This leads to personal growth that enables diverse experiences.

To conclude, this journey of shedding old skin and embracing a fresh start is an invitation for each of us to experience the art of living a more liberated and fulfilling way of life by consciously choosing greater openness, freedom, and authenticity.